Written by Karen D. Swim
There is a television show that follows around cake throwing, profanity spouting, possessed by Satan would be brides and films the train wreck for American audiences to watch on television. It is appropriately titled Bridezillas.
I have watched only bits and pieces, two minutes in and I am so appalled that I cannot bear to watch any longer. However, I have seen enough to know that it’s not entirely unlike some of the experiences of modern work life.
Bridezillas are out of control would be brides who work themselves into a frenzy over wedding veils and cake toppers. Their cellphones become megaphones of hatred where they routinely dial up their wedding party to spew venom on their day.
These bridezillas micro manage everyone associated with the wedding except of course themselves. They frequently go over budget, isolate friends and family and are never on time to events they organized in great detail. They go to great lengths for the perfect wedding day but never spend a single moment planning for the actual marriage.
Like their wedding counterparts, business bride (or groom) zillas micromanage the tiniest details while failing to prepare for the big picture. They spend numerous hours having the copywriter reorganize periods and commas, and months choosing the background color for their website. No department or vendor is spared their oversight but they never seem to spend time working on their own expertise.
They can plan a perfect launch but are unprepared to actually serve customers. They can crack the whip and get things done but lack the ability to motivate and inspire teams. The wedding bridezilla’s staff is temporary and they gladly wrap up and move on to the next project. The buiness bridezilla’s staff wishes that were true.
The moral of this un-fairy tale? Beware of monsters in frily costumes.
Have you ever met a business bridezilla? How did you manage the bad behavior while still getting your job done?
lol, I am not surprised to hear this is true…but the woman has done a phenomenal job of constant reinvention. I just wonder “at what price success?”
Alex, I bet you have some great stories. When it comes to clients like that I have one simple rule – Life is too short!
Andrew, sadly some truly miss this believing management by force is the best option. I talk with many Corporate refugees and great talents are lost due to this style.
I absolutely love and admire her, but I hear that Madonna’s quite the business bridezilla . . . and I think it surprises no one.
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Whenever I encountered one of these as a Professional Organizer, I would literally walk away from the business, of course providing them good support, but in something so subjective as organizing where a lot of the value comes from the perception of value anyone who was micromanaging would never see the value in the money spent, so better to get out – FAST!
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Karen,
I agree – whilst it is important to provide people with the support which they need, if you do not have sufficient confidence to give them a degree of latitude, then you probably don’t have the right people in the first place.
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@Fred, I nodded my head in sad agreement when I read: “Sad thing is there are managers out there who purposefully adopt this attitude because they think it is the greatest way to motivate their team.” I talk to and work with so many who are living with this management style right now. It is demoralizing, and non-productive. Re Bridezillas, it is kind of like a train wreck you want to tear your eyes away but are so shocked you have to watch! LOL!
@Rebecca, hey I think I know that client! LOL! Reading your comment made me shudder from the memory all over again but as you said we can walk away. Those poor employees are stuck with the bridezillas. Hmm, rethinking my plan to return to the traditional work force. 🙂
@Andrew, in some environments micro-management can be good, for example in dealing with processes and technologies that require a high degree of accuracy. However, when dealing with people good leaders hire people for their expertise and should then trust them to do the job, and support their growth as they make mistakes. You get more from your people when you give them wings to fly than when you insist on pulling the strings. 😉
@Alina, I love your comment! I also love bright shiny things! But you’re right it’s fine to plan for the big event but we must never forget it is an event, a one time thing and that after the event the roll up your sleeves work comes. Better to enjoy the process and not stress if something does not go according to plan and spend your efforts for what comes next. 🙂
Wow, quite a great choice of a tv show to explain what can go wrong in business life! I guess when it comes to brides as well as business people, it’s really easy to be mesmerized by the bright and shiny event (wedding/launch/event) and forget the important part is what comes after. Plus, the bright and shiny distractions are always easier 🙂 You can go crazy planning them, but no matter how fancy it all is, it’s definitely easier than what’s next. It also has to do with silly superstitions. I know a lot of people who still believe that if something goes wrong during the wedding/launch, it will jinx everything that follows.
The solution would be to never forget what’s really important. Whenever you’re going overboard, it would be wise to stop, remember the goals behind it all and then resume whatever you were doing.
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Karen,
Provided it doesn’t detract from the bigger picture, I would imagine that the ability to micro-manage with a high degree of attention to detail could be a wonderful asset.
That said, I can see the hypocrisy of those who are first to find the smallest fault in others but fail to see their own shortcomings.
How do you think that such a person could work under managers and team leaders who inspire but are not great with the details. Do you think such a person could make a good assistant?
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An excellent analogy, Karen!
Unfortunately, I’ve been that copywriter, working with a bridezilla client who is more obsessed over comma placement than actual content. Luckily, when my contract was up, I simply gave my best advice and walked away. Business bridezilla’s employees, on the other hand, were not so lucky …
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Oh wow. This could be an idea that really spices up manager training classes. “Do you see yourself in how the bride is acting?” There was a marathon of this show on a while back and as a ‘guilty pleasure’ I kept switching back to see what was happening next. Beyond belief. Sad thing is there are managers out there who purposefully adopt this attitude because they think it is the greatest way to motivate their team.
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