Last night I read Want to Be Successful, Stop Trying So Hard on BNET by Steve Tobak that began:
If you’re reading this post, chances are you’re driven by achievement and success, at least to some extent. Well, some of the most career-oriented, success-minded individuals drive themselves too hard and become their own worst enemy. I’m not talking about work-life balance; I’m talking about how your drive can become toxic to your career.
Thankfully, I have not become my own worst enemy but I am all too aware of how easy it is to upset that balance. How many of us know that guy or woman for whom work-life balance is non-existent?
The post goes on to describe how the author had his own wake up call that transformed his life and career. He learned to let go and as a result his career soared. Tobak woke up before he destroyed his health and marriage. The only collateral damage was a job loss, but that was enough for him to make a real life change.
As I read, I wondered when did our lives become about career. We wish for more hours in the day so that we can get more work done. We give up sleep and time with our friends and family for our career. Is our life’s purpose work or is it life?
I am all for career happiness and spend a great deal of my working life helping leaders create happy work places and employees find those places, yet I am aware that life is so much bigger than our job title.
We have 168 hours in a week. Today, many people see the 40 hours per week as light, with many working 60 hours or more. Assuming that we work 40 hours, and sleep 42 hours per week, we have spent half the week on those two activities alone. This does not even count the amount of time some spend actually commuting to and from a job, or spending off time on work tasks (conference calls on vacation, emails before you get to the office).
With our precious remaining 86 hours per week, we must manage the other details of our lives such as children, families, health, nourishment, cleaning and errands.
I am a realist. Life cannot be all fun and games (or so they tell me) but it would be a revolution if we decided to take back more of our lives. My guess is that we’d actually get more done in fewer hours if our lives were in balance. We’d sleep and eat better and spend time with people who nourished our souls. With energized bodies and refreshed minds, there would be no limit to what we could accomplish.
At least that’s the way it plays out in the fantasy of my own mind. Maybe I cannot convince the world to chill out but in this I can lead by example.
Are you with me?
Speaking of career, I’m doing a twinterview (twitter interview) with Rick Ceciltoday at 11 am EST. Rick will be asking follow up questions to the interview he did with me a few months ago that ran this week. If you’re not too busy working, please stop in and tweet with us. 🙂
Nobody ever lamented on their death bed, if ONLY I had stayed at the office one more hour!!
Work is important but you can’t work well without maintaining a good health! Always honor yourself with what YOU need and step AWAY from the computer when necessary. The world will not implode if you take care of yourself FIRST.
.-= Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach´s last blog ..Today’s Humor of the Day – Funny Microsoft Windows Errors =-.
What wonderful ideas, Karen!
There’s so much more to life than work; yet, it’s far too easy to forget that when we’re right smack in the middle of the quest to make a buck! It’s so tempting to throw ourselves so completely into our work that we have little time for anything — or anyone — else. And that’s really sad when we stop to think about it (if we stop to think about it).
Balance is so important and yet can be so difficult to achieve. Perhaps balance is a state of mind — or at least starts with a state of mind — one that recognizes the importance of living life to its fullest. Once we recognize that living a full life includes far more than work, it becomes so much easier to see beyond the daily grind and seek new, creative ways of working more effectively so there’s time left over for the things that really matter.
@Karen,
Exactly – if the end goal is the possibility of death on the job, there are much more fun ways to get there (e.g. driving racing cars, test pilot etc. – expiring in my cubicle isn’t one of them!)
@Alex,
I’m with you on this 100 percent – countless times I’ve read the “oh, it isn’t all glory running your own business, be prepared to work 80 hours a week”.
Umm… you’re now the boss, so no one to blame but yourself, if you’re working that hard and you don’t like it!
(I don’t mean “you” personally, of course – I know you understand balance.)
This is why I totally resist the whole “you must work 60 to 100 hours a week if you’re a new business” thing. I measure success a different way and having a boyfriend, friends and me time are a part of that success, not just the business.
.-= Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome´s last blog ..What Carries You Through The Tough Times? =-.
Brett, that is a chilling wake up call. I applaud you for standing up for balance. At my bank, one of the long term employees dropped dead at work. One of the other ladies quit declaring that she would not be carried away from the job in a body bag. At my old job, a few people made it to retirement and died within the year. I don’t think any of us have a goal to work ourselves literally to death but it happens far too often.
I am glad that you are still here, providing wisdom and inspiration.
Hello Randy and thanks for dropping by!
My boss literally died at work this year.
He had been talking about how stressed out he was, and how he was looking forward to a month’s vacation.
He also used to speak fondly of what he would do when he retired (less than two years away).
You know what?
No one talks about him anymore at work.
No one.
I remember him telling me (when our backs were against the wall on a deadline) about the time his boss came to his house on a Saturday night, because he was late, and they had to finish the work *right now*, and how I wouldn’t want that to happen.
I looked him dead in the eye and said, “If anyone ever does that to me, I’ll give them one warning to get off my property and then I’ll call the police, career or not.”
I’m not sure he was happy with what I said… but he’s gone now, and I’m still here.
Whoo hoo for quality! I had someone yesterday respond in surprise when I mentioned I only check email twice per day. It’s too easy to get sucked in so I set aside specific times to check it and then I’m out. If the world is falling apart and it’s not 12 noon or 4 pm you’ll have to call and let me know. 🙂 I love your approach Jan and especially love your post today, go less but go BIG!
Conor, I agree with you. We are much better for ourselves and all those around us when we take time for life. I have been there too and as you say when you ignore parts of yourself you are not fully you.
I’m with you on that Brad! I am not at all fond of multitasking, although I sometimes do it too but am far more effective when I chunk tasks and tackle one thing at a time.
Andrew, having made the move back home I suspect that you really do get the balance. 🙂 Wouldn’t it be interesting if we only worked say 4 hours a day and the rest was life. 🙂
Less is definitely more. I cleared my entire work table on Monday. Just took everything to the garage to make “project bundles, or boxes”. So I could focus on doing less, but doing it better. Only one thing on the table at a time. We’ll see how that works out. If the lessening of tension in my shoulders is any clue., we’re on the right track. Doing the same with my inbox and every other portal I have…quality, not quantity…
Hi Karen,
I share your fantasy. I find that when I make time to indulge my passions, it forces me to divide my time better in all areas and strive for balance.
Now when I spend time with the people I love, they get the best of me, energised, passionate and full of the joys. The times when my passions and dreams have taken a back seat I have been a shadow of my self.
Refreshment is not hard to find, and doesn’t take time..take a short walk, read an uplifting book or article, listen to a song. Indulge the things that stoke the fire in your soul. It will be better for you, and everyone else in your life.
Conor
Hi Karen, I am with you, and have always been a proponent of not biting off more than you can chew. I feel much more comfortable focusing on a few things and trying to do them well. Everything becomes more enjoyable that way – even the errands – and you get a little more sense of control.
.-= Brad Shorr´s last blog ..Must-Have Web Tools for Small Businesses =-.
Karen,
Steve’s story is certainly powerful and represents a timely reminder that whilst our professional careers certainly constitute a very important aspect of our lives, they should never be allowed to define who we are.
I hate to borrow this expression to some extent but I think that it is absolutely vital that we actually make time to ‘do’ some living as well as ‘making’ a living.
Yes, there is a time for work, but there is also a time for chilling out and having fun and forgetting about life, either by ourselves or with the people that we love.
.-= Andrew´s last blog ..Back home/back online! =-.
I’ve been reading along for a while now. I just wanted to drop you a comment to say keep up the good work.