Rip the Veil or Close the Blinds?

September 30, 2009

“On one hand access to more is terrific, more info, more options, more entertainment, more flexibility, fewer gatekeeping restrictions….. on the other hand, access to more is like a train wreck of distasteful and tacky come to town, hell bent on leaving it’s mark and lifting its skirt…a lost weekend of things we just really don’t need to know…but some how…watch anyway…”–Janice Cartier

The conversations around transparency have been rich with examples and thoughtful insights. As Janice Cartier, so colorfully observed, a little too much transparency can make us all blush with shame even as we continue to watch in abject horror.

For some this kind of transparency has become a brand that they have leveraged with success. There are many who put it all on full display, and continue to command attention, while others lose position when we get even a peek behind half closed blinds.

It is clear that there is no universal standard for transparency. We want to pull down the curtain and see the wizard in certain areas and in others we’d rather continue to believe in magic.

In The Transparent Leader, authors Herb Baum and Tammy Kling address transparency in business. They share case studies and successes from companies that developed an “open culture.” Transparency did not equate to “telling it all” but honestly communicating at all levels about issues related to the company. The book acknowledged that business leaders must balance that openness with a certain amount of filtering.

Heather Villa shared how she filters her own open communication:

“I won’t talk about my religious beliefs, my political views, my intimate relationships, or anything else highly controversial or personal. I believe those types of discussions are meant for your immediate family (if not completely personal) and is ‘too much’ transparency.”

Heather is a business owner active in social media. She shares business and personal information but has wisely developed filters for her transparency. In her case, she realizes that too much transparency can be polarizing and may damage current and prospective relationships with customers.

From those in positions of power, we demand a higher standard of excellence. We take joy in the glimpses of transparency but if the blinds are opened too far we lose respect for their position. We like to think of them as “everyman” or “everywoman” but we don’t want them to prove it.

“We have all the tools to publish what happens at every moment in our lives, but we lack the wisdom and experience to edit all that rough draft and make something interesting.”– Jamie Grove

“…airing our dirty laundry to everyone is a little dangerous, and possibly a little over-indulgent.”–Conor

Jamie and Conor aptly point out that exercising a little editing with our transparency is wise. We really don’t have to tell it all. We can tell what is relevant, and even share a little that’s not, but exposing it all can be dangerous and alienating and as Conor noted a little over-indulgent.

Fred Schlegel offered a chilling reality: “Since there really is no way to limit what is public about our lives, we must put in place rules on how the more powerful entities use that info. Sorry to get all George Orwell on ya, but the public info is just the tip of the iceberg.”

Perhaps some believe that they will take charge of the illusion of privacy by ripping down their own veil. I know what’s behind that curtain and I’m determined to hang on to the false illusion of a little mystery for as long as I possibly can.

Does the amount of information shared change your level of respect for a person? Is the boundary the same for everyone or does it depend on other factors?

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

The Trend of Transparency

September 28, 2009

Have we pushed the boundaries so far that we have crossed the line from transparency to indecency? On December 23, 2004, President Bush signed the Video Voyeurism Prevention Act of 2004 into law. In less than a decade, we have gone from being outraged by secret videotaping to willingly sharing our own secrets in every available medium.

Between blogs, YouTube and Reality television, nothing is left to the imagination. I don’t know about you but I could live knowing a little less about everyone’s private lives. People date, marry, get pregnant, have children, divorce, fight addictions and illnesses in full view of cameras. The allure of mystery has given way to the fashion of telling it all to everyone and if you’re lucky you may profit from your effort.

“One man’s transparency is another’s humiliation.” –Gerry Adams

This need to “tell all” is not confined to entertainment but has changed how we share information at every level. News reports provide gruesome and unnecessary details about crimes exposing victims and their families to further pain. We demand accountability from the business world but hold ourselves to different standards as customers and employees as we share our perspectives, opinions and ideas without censure.

Don’t get me wrong, this blog and my other social media activities validate that I am an active contributor and participant in new media. I am not a sideline observer but one fully in the echo chamber questioning our use and participation. I applaud the ability to share information, resources, and yes, opinions but openness is not without consequence. Though our current culture seems to suggest otherwise, I still believe that we have responsibility for our words and actions.

Let’s examine it this week. What do you think, have we gone too far or not far enough?

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Are You Working Your Life or Is Your Life Work?

September 23, 2009

Last night I read Want to Be Successful, Stop Trying So Hard on BNET by Steve Tobak that began:

If you’re reading this post, chances are you’re driven by achievement and success, at least to some extent. Well, some of the most career-oriented, success-minded individuals drive themselves too hard and become their own worst enemy. I’m not talking about work-life balance; I’m talking about how your drive can become toxic to your career.

Thankfully, I have not become my own worst enemy but I am all too aware of how easy it is to upset that balance. How many of us know that guy or woman for whom work-life balance is non-existent?

The post goes on to describe how the author had his own wake up call that transformed his life and career. He learned to let go and as a result his career soared. Tobak woke up before he destroyed his health and marriage. The only collateral damage was a job loss, but that was enough for him to make a real life change.

As I read, I wondered when did our lives become about career. We wish for more hours in the day so that we can  get more work done. We give up sleep and time with our friends and family for our career. Is our life’s purpose work or is it life?

I am all for career happiness and spend a great deal of my working life helping leaders create happy work places and employees find those places, yet I am aware that life is so much bigger than our job title.

We have 168 hours in a week. Today, many people see the 40 hours per week as light, with many working 60 hours or more. Assuming that we work 40 hours, and sleep 42 hours per week, we have spent half the week on those two activities alone. This does not even count the amount of time some spend actually commuting to and from a job, or spending off time on work tasks (conference calls on vacation, emails before you get to the office).

With our precious remaining 86 hours per week, we must manage the other details of our lives such as children,  families, health, nourishment, cleaning and errands.

I am a realist.  Life cannot be all fun and games (or so they tell me) but it would be a revolution if we decided to take back more of our lives. My guess is that we’d actually get more done in fewer hours if our lives were in balance. We’d sleep and eat better and spend time with people who nourished our souls. With energized bodies and refreshed minds, there would be no limit to what we could accomplish.

At least that’s the way it plays out in the fantasy of my own mind. Maybe I cannot convince the world to chill out but in this I can lead by example.

Are you with me?

Speaking of career, I’m doing a twinterview (twitter interview) with Rick Ceciltoday at 11 am EST. Rick will be asking follow up questions to the interview he did with me a few months ago that ran this week.  If you’re not too busy working, please stop in and tweet with us.

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Here and There

September 22, 2009

I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Rick Cecil a few months ago. Part 1 ran yesterday, and today is Part 2. I hope you’ll pop over and give Rick your support.

What do boots, horses and spy gadgets have in common? Jump over to Jubilant Joyful Learning today and all will be revealed in my guest post.

I hope to see you in one or both places and hey tell a friend!

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Creepy Strangers and Bad Sales Tactics

September 21, 2009

In the community where I live, our mail is delivered to a community mailbox, rather than to individual homes. The daily trip to pick up the mail is an opportunity to have small chat with your neighbors. On one recent mail trip, I arrived at the same time as a new neighbor. We exchanged pleasantries as we each went to our boxes to gather mail.

A conveniently placed trash receptacle at the boxes makes it easy to sort your mail and discard unwanted pieces.  I moved toward the receptacle just as she was closing her own box and walking toward the curb. “If you know anyone who needs a babysitter, I live right there,” she said pointing at a corner home. In case I had missed the pointing, she recited the address. A little dumbstruck, I think I must have nodded and smiled and muttered okay. She went on to tell me that she was retired and now cares for children. We bid each other a good day and moved toward home.

She did not introduce herself even after the sales pitch. Should I simply tell friends to show up at her home and trust she was not a serial killer?

In sales and marketing, we have learned that people buy from people that they like and trust. However, those are steps 2 and 3. Before like and trust, there is “know.” This poor woman had skipped right to trust without establishing the basics. Many people commit the same sin daily in their marketing or networking efforts.

On Twitter, people auto DM a sales message upon following. In web copy, companies skip right to “buy now” without a proper introduction. They ask for trust but provide no basis to do so.

Does selling always require relationship? No. When you have the answer to an immediate or urgent need, or there are no other competitors, the sales process is very different. However, even companies with a monopoly will do far better by treating customers as if they have a choice. (Cable and utility companies take note.)

When you skip the all crucial “know” you are sending a message that your potential customers are not important. They are fresh prospects that serve to help you hit your profit margin. Your ideal customer is anyone with the ability to pay. Is that the message you really want to send?

Last week, Joanna Young provided tips on writing with intention and possibility and her tips on pacing and leading is perfect for the sales process:

If you’re writing to open up a sense of possibility in another person, you’ll need to do a little work to take them there. You can’t thrown them straight in.

I like to think of it as walking along a road with someone: you want them to get comfortable with your pace, your rhythm, your presence, before you start to do anything more dramatic.

If you take the time to lead verbally and in writing, rather than rushing head long into the sales process, you will experience better results and create longer-term relationships with your clients.

Do you prefer to get to know a person/company before moving to the sales process? What are triggers that make you feel better about going from stranger to potential customer?

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Bad Writing, Spinach and Mid Week Musings

September 16, 2009

Have you ever had an idea that was brilliant in your head but completely worthless once it left that comfy incubator between your ears? I heard something that inspired me and my brain cells began to fire as I mentally formulated a brilliant post.  I was excited and could barely wait to sit down and write.

Twenty minutes later, I sat at my keyboard tapping out my idea. I wrote two paragraphs and read in horror a jumbled, confusing mush of ideas that made me want to weep with embarrassment. I tried in earnest to fix it, and several mixed metaphors and half formed ideas later, I decided to close the document and walk away.

I had a bowl of spinach, which cured my brain fog and mood. An hour later, I returned to the post and declared it a horrible, depressing mess.

I learned two things:

1. Spinach is magical (for me at least)
2. Sometimes what you write really does stink, admit it and move on.

What have you learned this week?

For some decidely non-stinky writing, check out these posts by writers who clearly eat their spinach:

• Trees of Gestures – Amy Palko sees beauty in what some describe urban blight.
• The Sound of Rain – Janice Cartier’s writing always sings.  Somehow she even makes melancholy magical.
• Love Conkers All – A beautiful post by published author Stephen Fry.
• Stories to Pave the Path to Dreams – Emma Newman is a writer to watch, this post captures that restless feeling we all experience on the road to change.

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

The Language of Reinvention

September 14, 2009

This month there has been a focus on reinvention. It was not planned, but somehow the theme seemed to take on life of it’s own. An unplanned video seemed to spark a line of thought that won’t let go, just yet.

Have you ever noticed how you adjust your language when addressing different groups? While you may use your native tongue there are nuances. You may have a work language that allows you to communicate with colleagues that adjusts slightly when speaking with clients or your boss. You have a different language with your spouse than with your children. If you travel even domestically you may adjust your language for the region.

Reinvention has a language too and your words can move you toward action or inhibit your progress.  The language of reinvention is:

1. Clear. You are not maybe, possibly thinking of changing, you are doing it. You state clear objectives even if the map to achieve them is still unformed.
2. Hopeful. The process of change begins with a belief that you can. Throughout the journey you must keep this belief alive, especially in the face of challenge, with language that is positive.
3. Adventurous. Your language embraces possibilities, it is open and adventurous and speaks of what can be done rather than focusing on barriers.  Joanna Young has an excellent 3 part series going on the Language of Possibility.
4. New. When reinventing, especially if casting off unwanted behavior or circumstances choose new language to replace your old perspective.
   
5. Grateful. Your language reflects gratitude for the good in your life, which keeps you on balance and able to take action on the things that need changing.
6. Energetic. Your words lift you rather than pull you down. They spur you on to the finish with buoyancy.

You will notice that this new language is all about C-H-A-N-G-E.  If we change our language, our actions will follow.

Have you ever found yourself speaking a language that put up barriers to change? How did you work though it?

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Victim or Hero? What is Your Story?

September 11, 2009

I remember when 9/11 was simply a date on the calendar. That all changed eight years ago. The seemingly insignifcant numbers have come to represent the horrifying events that took place on September 11, 2001.  We now speak of them with a hushed reverence and silent tribute to the lives that were lost and prayers for those that were left behind.

However, along with the awful tragedy we also witnessed heroism, worldwide compassion and a unity that is unforgettable.

As I sit at my desk quietly remembering that day and the days that follow, my heart both aches for the losses and swells with pride as I remember the many acts of heroism during, and after the attacks by both those in uniform and ordinary citizens.  The many people who in the face of shock, anger, and fear simply chose to lead, serve and do.

I pray that none of us ever have to rise to a challenge like 9/11 or any of the other horrible terrorist attacks that have taken place across the world, but we all have the opportunity to be a hero in our everyday lives.

In his book, Be the Hero, Noah Blumenthal writes:

“Everyday heroes don’t always succeed, but they consistently act on the belief that they can do something to improve their situations and those of the people around them.” (pg. 2)

While Blumenthal’s book is not at all about 9/11, his assertion that  ”You can choose your response to everyday events that might disappoint, furstrate or anger you  - to react in a way that casts off the victim mentality and enables you to act with a hero’s resolve,” aptly describes the heroes of 9/11.

Quite simply, being a hero starts with thinking like one.

Today, is a National Day of Service and Rememberance . A day when we can choose to honor the memories of the lives lost by choosing to be an everyday hero. I believe that this is a most fitting tribute, don’t you?

Do you have any hero stories of your own to share? What does being the hero mean to you?

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Dream Killers and Vision Thieves

September 9, 2009

As I grow older, I am even more appreciative of the ability to dream. As adults with miles under our feet, scars from previous battles and the delicate balance that life demands, dreaming takes commitment.

Dreaming, thinking beyond our present circumstances to what could be, is the very essence of hope. Our dreams indicate that we still believe in more and that we are fiercely declaring we are alive as we continue to push past our now to achieve our tomorrow.

I am also aware that our visions and dreams must be guarded with the ferocity of a lioness protecting her cubs.

“Let one of your first decisions be to keep a closed mouth and open ears and eyes.” – Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich

When you are ready to turn your vision into reality, it is natural to want to share your excitement. It is after all momentous to move from dream to audacious belief. However, it is at this critical juncture when the dream killers and vision thieves lie in wait ready to sink your ship before it ever leaves the port.

These slayers are armed with grenades of doubt and swords with poisonous tips of opinions.  You unknowingly enter battle without the armor of decisive decision and the attackers level the lethal blow before you leave the gates of desire.

Your greatest weapon against this evil is silence. Share your dreams and visions with a trusted few. You will need the support of your spouse but think carefully who else is allowed into the inner sanctum. Your friends and family, though well meaning can launch the fiercest attacks, knowing your weak spots better than any stranger.

Gather a small but mighty band of support that will hold you accountable for your own belief, even as they cheer you on to victory.

Have you ever faced the dream killers and vision thieves? How did you handle it?

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Important Announcement for WordPress Users

September 8, 2009

Since moving to Michigan I have grown accustomed to television programs being interrupted with beeping sounds that indicate a Severe Weather Warning. This post is my own Severe Weather Warning to everyone with a self-hosted WordPress blog.

I shared this information over the long weekend but it’s worthy of posting here today. If you have a self-hosted WordPress site, it is important to upgrade to the latest version (2.8.4) now.  Older sites have been attacked which made for an unpleasant weekend for some bloggers.

Read the information from WordPress on how to keep your site safe, and read Lorelle’s post to find out if you have been attacked.

Regularly scheduled posts will resume tomorrow.

Thank you so much for reading! Subscribe to keep up with the latest posts and feel free to spread the word!Get free updates via RSS or email.

Next Page »

• Connect on Social Media

  Follow me on Twitter
  Connect on LinkedIn
  Social Media Policy
  Facebook Fan Page

• Get free updates – RSS or Email

  

  

• Recent Comments

  • Debbie Yost on Is Listening Part of Your Branding Strategy?
  • Debbie Yost on Hard but Not Forever
  • Andrew Heaton on Hard but Not Forever
  • Your Social Media Neighbourhood: Are You Keeping Good Company? | Confident Writing on It’s All About You
  • Shari Smothers on Has Your Fire Fizzled?

• Badges & Buttons
• 
• 
• Blog Network:

  Name:
  Words For Hire

  Topics:
  Inspiration, Business, Marketing

  Join my network

  Blog Networks
•