Be The Hero

August 7, 2009

Written by Karen D. Swim

Be the Hero: Three Powerful Ways to Overcome Challenges in Work and Life is a new book by Noah Blumenthal. The book is essentially about overcoming self-inflicted victimization. It inspires us to change the stories we tell ourselves, rise above and be the hero.

The book made the Top 20 in all books this week and it’s close to making the New York Times bestseller list for the week. Here’s the really cool part, all sales through Saturday, August 8th will count toward New York Times bestseller status. If When the book makes it Noah will donate 100% of his royalties from this bestselling week to the Miami Children’s Hospital.

Not a bad deal, you get a life changing book, and the chance to change the life of a child.

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Life, Writing | 5 Comments

Hop, Skip, Double and a Dip

April 14, 2009

Written by Karen D. Swim

I watched the little girls draw the crooked squares in colored chalk on the sidewalk. I smiled remembering my own childhood games of hopscotch. Hop, hop, hop. The first round was always easy because you knew what to expect. Hop, hop, hop, land, hop, land hop. You knew just how long you needed to balance on one leg before landing on two feet again.

Life sometimes feels like a game of hopscotch. Sometimes you maneuver a tiny square on one leg and in other places both feet are firmly planted on the ground. Along the way you pick up your marker as you progress from square to square. Unlike hopscotch, the squares are not neatly drawn in brightly colored chalk. You may find yourself balancing longer than is reasonably comfortable on one leg praying to reach the spot when you can put down both feet and steady yourself. Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, land, hop.

In hopscotch and life the game grows in complexity as you add more people. No longer jumping from square to square, you also have to jump over the obstacles that others have placed in your path. Hop, jump, jump, hop, hop, land, jump, hop.

As I sat musing, the little girls giggled, ponytails bobbing up and down as they each took turns, hopping, landing, and picking up their marker. Hop, land, hop, bend, jump, turn to do it again. I watched as the smaller little girl took her turn, eyes on the pattern, with determination in her eyes – hop, hop, hop, jump, hop, bend, stumble. Rather than become discouraged they collapsed into giggles, declared a winner and started a new game, hop, hop, hop, land, hop, land, hop.

I rose from the chair with a smile determined to go and start my own new game, no colored chalk required.

How’s your game these days? Are you jumping on one foot or two? Do you start a new game when you stumble or just go to the end of the line?

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Life | 15 Comments

Buck up or Break Down?

March 17, 2009

: Image via Wikipedia

Written by Karen D. Swim

Have you ever spent a day or two fighting off an illness? You feel sort of lousy but solider on at half speed not wanting to give in to being sick? Finally, you decide that it would be better to admit defeat and spend a day or two in bed. You realize that you could fight for a week and operate at reduced capacity or simply give in for a day or two and emerge recovered.

Sometimes holding back negative emotions is exactly like those days you waste pretending you’re not really sick. You exert your energy pretending that you’re not hurting, sad or angry – energy that could be directed at solving your problem.

There are times when bucking up is truly the smart thing to do, but at other times you really need to be kind enough to yourself to break down. In those times, to ignore what you feel can actually prevent you from taking positive action. So go ahead and cry, scream, rant, and eat a big fat bowl of ice-cream if that is what you need to get it out of your system. When you’re done, you can then focus completely on taking action to change your situation.

Are there times in your own life when you should have chosen to break down or vice versa? How do you decide when to cry “uncle” and when to tough it out?

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration, Inspiration for Life, Social Media | 4 Comments

What I Learned From Love

February 11, 2009

Written by Karen D. Swim

I sat by his bed with the notebook by my side. The day was warm and clear and I gazed into the backyard as he slept. He had worked so hard on the yard and it was one of our favorite things about our lovely little home. A vegetable garden right outside our bedroom window provided us with beautiful tomatoes, peppers, corn, herbs and greens. An array of beautiful blooms surrounded the yard like the borders of a frame. The trees seemed to gently watch over us as they stretched toward the sky.

A few weeks ago he had cut down huge branches from the tress closest to the house. He seemed like a man possessed. I hated watching trees being trimmed and my eyes brimmed with tears as I feared he was cutting too much. I asked him what he was doing. Without missing a beat with the saw he told me he had to do it while he could so I would not have to worry. My husband was not romantic in the traditional sense but his practical gestures of love were like a sonnet written upon my heart.

His gentle breathing quickened and I shook from my reverie, returning to the present. I looked over, ready to spring into action when he looked toward the right of the room. His brows knitted together, he asked “who are all those people?” I followed his eyes and asked softly, “What people honey?” “All those people, dressed in white.” I swallowed the lump in my throat before responding, “those are the angels honey they are watching over you.” Pleased with my answer he continued to look at them in silence. I don’t know what he saw but I felt a mixture of peace and sadness. I could not bear to let this man go, so many things left undone, but I knew that if it were to be he would be gently carried away to a far better place.

The following week I calmly called 911 when he struggled to breathe. I opened the notebook and gave the paramedics a full history of all that happened that day, blood pressure, pulse, glucose, medications, and more. They eyed me in amazement but love had taught me to keep track. I drove behind the ambulance to the hospital, making phone calls along the way. Once again, I sat by his bed, comforting, praying and loving him. Soon he was being wheeled to ICU and our hands locked together, I leaned in and told him I wanted him to live but if he needed to let go, I would be okay.

The words so easily tumbled from my lips in spite of the pain in my heart because love had taught me to put it first. It was not my pain that mattered but his peace. That was to be our final night. No words were left unspoken as the angels gently carried him away. Love taught me to embrace it fiercely, and cherish it deeply but to release it when the time came for it to soar to the heavens.

I learned from love how to let go.

This post is a contribution to the February What I Learned From groupwrite project. I struggled to hit publish on this one and Robert gently encouraged me and graciously offered to accept my late entry. Thank you Robert!

Wednesday Love List

Terry Starbucker, Floundering in a Sea of (Mis)Trust Terry Starbucker the man with the best play list on Twitter, discusses Animal House, peanut butter and the search for truth.
Love is blooming at Joyful Jubilant Learning, Joanna Young is having an affair and Steve Sherlock is trembling and turning to the Bard for love inspired poetry.
Are you a digital doer or page turning romantic, Ulla directs a lively discussion in the muse court of Berlin.
Street Trader or smart marketer? Andrew embarks on a thoughtful discussion of the street vendor.

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Life | 37 Comments

At Last

January 21, 2009

: Image via Wikipedia

Written by Karen D. Swim

Last night, U.S. President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama danced their first dance to the song At Last (originally recorded by Etta James). The song was recorded in 1961, four years before the National Voting Rights act was signed. Nearly a century later it has a new place in our history, marking yet another milestone in our country.

I have always loved this song but as I listened to it this morning I wondered, how many woke up this morning in anticipation of their own “At Last?” How many are still in the struggle for what sometimes may seem a far off battle? How many desperately want to celebrate their own At Last?

President Obama symbolized the culmination of a long fought battle for many Americans but as he pointed out the sacrifices of generations paved the way to that moment. As he stood in the national spotlight yesterday, he did it standing on the shoulders of so many who struggled, fought, sacrificed and most importantly believed there would be an “At Last.”

Your own moment may not be 50 years in the making but I urge you today to proudly stand upon the shoulders of those that have gone before you, and to link arms with those around you who will help you make it to your moment in the sun. It begins with belief and continues with action and yes, often sacrifice but this song can be your anthem too.

Are you working toward your own “At Last?” What keeps you motivated not to give up? Have you already arrived, and if so, have any tips to share?

Resources:

Voting Rights Act

Etta James Video

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Business, Inspiration for Life | 10 Comments

Blue Days

January 13, 2009

: Image by santacrewsgirl via Flickr

Written by Karen D. Swim

I am sad today. Even as I type that I wonder if this post will get published. After all, I could simply skip posting today and no one would be the wiser, right? I’m not big on public confessions or pity parties. I like to work through it and move on. So, I could be silent as I normally am, but I know myself too well, this will get published in it’s rambling, unedited honesty. I would feel like a fake and liar if I did not share with you this moment when I have so willingly shared so many others.

The sadness washed over me with the morning light. My legs felt heavier when I rose from the bed. It was expected in a way but so completely unexpected that I was not quite prepared for it. Then again, can you really prepare for sadness? You see today would have been my husband’s 51st birthday. There have been many birthdays since his passing but for some reason on this one I am melancholy.

Perhaps it is my own 45th birthday 4 days away that has made me vulnerable to reflective moments. I don’t know and I’m not even sure that I want to analyze it or figure it out. I do know that grief is a funny thing. It is not something that you start and finish. Like the tide it flows out and may be gone for years and then one day it rises and you may find yourself pulled under by its force. It may last a moment or a day and then as quickly as it came it is gone.

At first I did not realize why I was sad. I thought I was tired or just needed water. But as the grey fog persisted, I knew. My secret is out, I’m human. I hate being confronted with that reality but it’s true.

I have been here before and I know that it’s possible by the time this is published, I’ll be okay again. But then again, I may not be and that is okay too. And because I always like to have a point, I guess my point today is “feel what you need to feel when you need to feel it.” Okay, so it’s not an eloquent point but it is a point. Seriously, these blue moments remind me of my capacity to love another human being. The grey makes me appreciate the sunshine. Even as I shed a tear over what is lost, my heart sings in gratitude for all that I have now and all that is to come.

Sometimes the only way to get through is by acknowledging where you are in this moment. I could allow shame to prevent me from admitting a weakness but I’d much rather be true to you and myself and admit, today I need a little help.

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Life | 40 Comments

How Santa Busted My Recession Blues

October 17, 2008

Written by Karen D. Swim

One evening last week, I sat on my couch debating whether to make the trek to gather the mail. After all, it had been a long day and it would simply sit untouched anyway. As I was debating, the news hummed in the background with an incessant procession of bad news. I rubbed my neck and decided the fresh air would be good.

I walked quickly inhaling the brisk fall air, enjoying the crisp breeze on my cheeks. I reached the bank of mailboxes and saw an unfamiliar face. “Hello,” I called out cheerily. The man looked up and returned with a warm and hearty “Good Evening!” He looked to be in his lte 60’s with nearly white hair. Although older, he had a physically imposing presence softened by ruddy cheeks and a twinkle in his eye reminiscent of Santa Claus.

“How are you this evening?” I asked. “I am wonderful and so blessed!” “My box was at the opposite end and we were now facing one another. I looked up with a wide grin, “I love hearing that!” “Oh yes, everyone asks me how I can be so happy with all of the bad things that are happening but I tell them none of that stuff matters.” We chatted as we gathered our and then walked toward one another meeting in the middle on the sidewalk.

“For most of my life I could not walk. I’m in my sixties now. The technology finally caught up and I had an operation a few months ago. I have a cane in the car but slowly but surely I need it less and less. I may move a little slow but I can walk. The economy, gas prices, none of this stuff matters, I can walk!” With tears in his eyes he warned me that he was going to hug me and grabbed me in a hug.

He then stepped back and with a tear in his eye declared “You’re a nice lady and I knew I just had to tell you that!”

We exchanged names and cheery good-byes. He walked to his car and I practically skipped off into the night air. He said his name was Paul, but it sure felt like a visit with Santa.

I have thought of Paul often and always with a smile. Whenever I am feeling the strain of long days, or too much exposure to bad news, I hear the words “I can walk!” The memory of “Santa Paul” reminds me of what is truly important.

Do you have a special memory that never fails to lift your mood? Or perhaps it’s a favorite place, quote or joke? Let’s talk about it in the comments.

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration, Inspiration for Life | 11 Comments

One Less Member of the Posse

October 9, 2008

Dad and Leon Written by Karen D. Swim

I called my Dad yesterday and was treated to his usual jovial greeting. Yet, there was something there, a hint of wistfulness or was it sadness? After answering my usual questions about his day, he revealed that his dear friend had passed away. As he related the news, there was a catch in his throat that caused my heart to drop.

My dad had his 79th birthday last month. Many of his friends or “partners” as he calls them have passed away. This friend, Leon was one of the last. In recent years my Dad spent many days driving to nursing homes to visit his “partners” sharing old stories and kidding one another. Watching them, a little hunched over, some with canes nearby, the years fell away and they once again became young men ready to take on the world.

I have lost two dear friends and a husband and while painful the losses are different at this age of life. Death comes like an intruder, a thief in the night. At my Dad’s age, death becomes the inevitable and as your friends succcumb you are face to face with your own mortality.

With each loss, my Dad loses a piece of his history. There are few left who walked the journey with him, and shared the adventures. He is now the lone historian, keeping the memories alive by sharing them with his family.

My Dad is an upbeat sort and even in sadness is quick with a joke or smile. He misses his partners, but has maintained his own taste for living. He walks a little slower these days but unaided, and we have to speak a little louder over the phone, but he is in good health. He reminds me to cherish these days and the friends and family that surround me; to laugh, love and truly live.

We talk for awhile remembering Leon and sharing mundane details. There are moments of contemplative silence in between the chat and laughs. When we hang up it is not without a heartfelt “I love you,” and grins that can be heard in the melody of our good-byes.

I hug the phone to my heart as the call disconnects, giving thanks for my Dad and the time we have shared. While I cannot control the length of days, I can cherish my now, and I intend to do just that.

How do you make the most of your days? Please share your thoughts, remembrances or whatever is on your mind in the comments. I cherish your conversation and take joy in hearing from you.

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Life | 26 Comments

Shadow Box Your Way to Success

October 1, 2008

Image by hmmlargeart via Flickr

Written by Karen D. Swim

Jab, jab, block, jab, jab, hook. The young boy danced and punched away at his shadow. Seeing his imaginary opponent, anticipating moves, block, punch, punch, hook. His father stood quietly in the background, watching him fighting his shadow, preparing for the real thing. The boy had gotten stronger, more assured. Each punch seemed to land an imaginary knock-out. Punch, punch, hook, punch, block. Sweat poured from the boy’s brow as he dipped, blocked and punched at his shadow. The boy was focused, his shadow was his sparring partner as he readied for the real battle ahead. Punch, punch, jab, hook.
We should all shadow box. Each of us has an opponent to overcome, a battle to win in every area of life. We cannot always practice in the ring but we can prepare for battle by shadow boxing. We can practice our moves, anticipate return punches, quicken our steps and grow stronger and more confident. The practice, though imaginary readies us for battle, prepares us to win.

Sometimes the shadowy opponent represents our own inner selves. We punch away at fear. We take a jab at doubt. Punch, punch, jab, jab until we stand the victor, dominating the ring. Or as Sonia Simone wrote last month, we punch to practice. We train our minds, bodies, and craft to do battle and win.

Whether your battle is a big sales call, marketing your business, a presentation, job interview or starting a weight loss plan, punch away at your shadowy opponent. Anticipate when they will move left, or right. Imagine the obstacles and punch through them. Feel the weight as you tire and keep punching anyway. Punch, punch, jab, hook. It worked for the boy, it can work for you too.

How do you prepare for the “battles” of your life? Do you practice or wing it? Your comments are welcomed here, so join the fun!

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Posted by Karen Swim | Filed Under Inspiration for Life | 10 Comments

I’m Still Standing! I’m Still Strong!

September 19, 2008

Written by Karen D. Swim

“It don’t matter what you tried to do, you couldn’t destroy me! I’m still standing! I’m still strong! And I always will be. “– Antwone Fisher, 2002

I saw Antwone Fisher in 2002, when it was first released. I was drawn to the story line about a young man who enlists in the Navy, and is helped by a Naval psychiatrist to finally confront the demons of his past. It was a powerful movie that dealt with family, friendship and finding inner peace. In one particularly moving scene the main character, Antwone Fisher (played by Derek Luke) spoke the lines above. When I heard them something awakened in my own heart, as these words seemed to echo in my spirit. At the time I was facing no particular challenge but I tucked the words away knowing that somehow they belonged to me.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xgewaRT_ow&feature=related]

Over the years, these lines have become my personal mantra when facing adversity. I sometimes modify it to “I’m still standing. I”m still here,” but every iteration strengthens me and renews my determination to fight through the obstacles. As I speak them out loud, they seem to plant my feet on solid ground and enclose me in an impenetrable fortress. Though life may swirl around me I am reminded that I am indeed still standing.

I thought of this line this week as I received word from friends in Texas in the wake of Hurricane Ike. Friends like Robert Hruzek and Mrs. MZM who thankfully made it through the storm. As reports and pictures came in, I was glad that they too were still standing, all the more poignant as in so many instances the Hurricane had leveled so many homes.

Life may have dealt you a few setbacks but you are still standing. Your legs may shake from the effort but as long as you can proclaim that you are standing there is hope. I have been painfully aware in my own life that often it is not the movement that matters but the ability to simply stand. To stand in the face of adversity, to stand when everything seems to conspire to knock you down, to stand when the ground shakes and the skies rumble, to stand when then the torrential rains beat at your door, to stand when others are pushing you to move.

Today as I face the business and personal challenges in my own life, I am so very thankful to report that I’m still standing. I’m still strong. And I always will be.

Do you have a favorite line from a movie or book that gives you strength or uplifts your spirit? Share your favorites in the comment box below. All of your comments are welcome.

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