In online publishing there is an oft repeated mantra about writing for your readers. While it is true that you should write for your readers rather than search engines, there is a gaping hole in the advice.  When you face the blank page to tell your story, the last thing you need is an audience, even when the audience is only in your head.

Even the most experienced writer often faces the nasty inner critic, who shows up to heckle and deter you from your writing process. If you allow readers into the room you can guarantee that at least one of them will be a critic. In his book On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft , author Stephen King advises that you tell the story to yourself first. It is advice that helped me get my first novel onto paper. I had to shut the door and lock out the readers, and the critics in order to first tell the story.

Writing is one of the few tasks in which focusing on the end result can hinder rather than help. You cannot sit down to write a New York Times bestseller or a viral blog post. Initially it is you and the story, whatever that story may be. When you have told the story then you allow the readers to help you refine and polish it.

Writing without an audience can yield surprising results. You may discover stories or storytelling elements that never would have blossomed without creative freedom.

Whether or not you are a writer, we all have to write – reports, presentations, correspondence  - and we have all faced the critic that makes us anxious about the end result. How would you apply King’s advice in your writing? Would it ease the task of writing if you did it without thought about the end result?

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This is the third post in a series on communications in the digital age. You can read Part I and Part II here and here.

I ran across a statistic at the HBR website that drives home the need for being able to communicate well. According to a recent survey of 120 blue-chip American companies poor writing costs businesses $3 billion a year to correct. This is the result of only two-thirds of employees being able to write well.  Is poor communication costing you money? Are you spending time mitigating the fallout from a poorly written email? Are you being perceived as a poor leader because you are unable to convey clear expectations to your team? Have you been passed over for a promotion because of your communication style?

Great communicators rise to the top in corporations. It is a valued skill to be able to articulate ideas, messages and thoughts clearly and succinctly. This translates well in our personal lives as well. How many family disagreements arise from communication failures?

Communication IQ is comprised of the ability to:
• Clearly convey thoughts and emotions
• Listen actively
• Demonstrate empathy
• Recognize emotions
• Walk the talk
• Use conflict constructively by being solution focused
• Gain respect through ethical and respectful behavior

Source: Effective Communication & Communication IQ | eHow.com

Improving our communication intelligence is not as complex as it may seem. The tips below will help you instantly improve your communication.

1. Communicate to be understood. You can instantly improve your communication skills by focusing on the listener, rather than broadcasting a message or making a point.
2. Be attentive to the spaces between the words. We have the ability to say much more than the words we speak or write. If you’re angry, calm down before sending that “professional” email.
3. Two ears, one mouth. Listen twice as much as you speak and you will boost your communication skills overnight.
4. Match the message to the medium. Save long, layered messages for real interaction. Use email, text and other short form communication for easy to communicate messages, ideas and updates.
5. Receive with grace. We can avoid communication conflict by managing our own emotional reactions. Rather than respond in kind to a terse email, leave the emotion out of it and respond with grace. Remember that not everyone is a skilled communicator.

Do you have tips to add to the list above? Have you ever been on the receiving end of poor communication? What was the impact and how was it resolved?

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Last week, I read a post by Joanna Paterson at MidLife Journal on Facebook in which she distinguished writing with a capital “W “from writing. The phrase resonated with me and I found myself thinking of it, turning it over, and journaling about it.

Joanna wrote:

“…writing doesn’t need to start with a capital W. There’s a role and a place for that kind of writing, of course there is, and I know many of us dream of getting our work ‘out there’, published, and read.

But there’s a whole lot of other writing that isn’t ever going to end up on someone’s bookshelf.” (Writing and Pathways of the Heart)

We all have our capital W writing – business communications, proposals, presentations, white papers, emails and more. It is the writing that is defined by the intended reader. We craft it with carefully chosen words and phrases with the knowledge that it will be read and in essence will be a reflection of our knowledge and talent.

While the capital W writing certainly has its place the professionalism of it can actually get in the way of the words.

Small w writing for me most often happens with a pen. It is “soul writing,” that comes from a place deep within where raw honesty supersedes style and content. My pen functions as a pipeline to my inner being where thoughts, ideas and feelings drain freely onto the page. In this haven of uncensored thought, the inner critic does not exist. There are no rules and thoughts are allowed to shove their way in uninvited even if the result is a page of seemingly fragmented nonsense.

If you have ever written a letter with no intention of sending it, or poured your heart out in a journal then you know the intensity and satisfaction of small w writing.

Some small w writing should remain private, a safe haven where you can work through the inner complexities without over analyzing the content of your message. Yet, I can’t help but wonder how much better we would communicate if we allowed at least a little of this into our public writing. Would we see posts and articles that were passionate and pure? Would we forgive less polished writing for writing that was heart felt and intense? Would we move past convention as we focus on communication?

I am convinced that writing from the soul always has a place whether is it done with a capital W or small w. How about you?

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