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Written by Karen D. Swim
Have you ever spent a day or two fighting off an illness? You feel sort of lousy but solider on at half speed not wanting to give in to being sick? Finally, you decide that it would be better to admit defeat and spend a day or two in bed. You realize that you could fight for a week and operate at reduced capacity or simply give in for a day or two and emerge recovered.
Sometimes holding back negative emotions is exactly like those days you waste pretending you’re not really sick. You exert your energy pretending that you’re not hurting, sad or angry – energy that could be directed at solving your problem.
There are times when bucking up is truly the smart thing to do, but at other times you really need to be kind enough to yourself to break down. In those times, to ignore what you feel can actually prevent you from taking positive action. So go ahead and cry, scream, rant, and eat a big fat bowl of ice-cream if that is what you need to get it out of your system. When you’re done, you can then focus completely on taking action to change your situation.
Are there times in your own life when you should have chosen to break down or vice versa? How do you decide when to cry “uncle” and when to tough it out?
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I usually cry uncle when I’ve made enough mistakes to cost me an hour’s worth of work. That’s when I know it’s time to give in. 🙂
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@Brad, letting go is so hard isn’t it? It’s amazing because in reality we never are in control. You’re right there is freedom in letting go, the very thing we sometimes fear the most.
@Barbara, hearing this from you really encouraged me today. I have only known you as strong woman and I think it’s good to hear from someone like you that it is indeed okay to “give yourself permission to heal.” Big hugs to you for that comment!
After years and years and years and years and years and years of dealing with that, I’ve learned to trust my body when it says “Time to Crash and Burn!”. I’ll then tell my kids, Mom is off-duty, make myself a soup and take myself to bed where I’ll read, watch Animal Planet, etc.etc.etc.
Giving yourself permission to heal is a Very Good Thing Indeed.
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach´s last blog post..Adding sizzle to your elliptical workout
Hi Karen, A great question! I’ve found that at times the best thing to do is stop trying to control things. We simply cannot control everything. When we put ourselves in God’s hands, or leave matters to fate – however you want to think about it – there comes a feeling of freedom and a sense of confidence, paradoxical as it sounds.
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