“On one hand access to more is terrific, more info, more options, more entertainment, more flexibility, fewer gatekeeping restrictions….. on the other hand, access to more is like a train wreck of distasteful and tacky come to town, hell bent on leaving it’s mark and lifting its skirt…a lost weekend of things we just really don’t need to know…but some how…watch anyway…”–Janice Cartier
The conversations around transparency have been rich with examples and thoughtful insights. As Janice Cartier, so colorfully observed, a little too much transparency can make us all blush with shame even as we continue to watch in abject horror.
For some this kind of transparency has become a brand that they have leveraged with success. There are many who put it all on full display, and continue to command attention, while others lose position when we get even a peek behind half closed blinds.
- Image via Wikipedia
It is clear that there is no universal standard for transparency. We want to pull down the curtain and see the wizard in certain areas and in others we’d rather continue to believe in magic.
In The Transparent Leader, authors Herb Baum and Tammy Kling address transparency in business. They share case studies and successes from companies that developed an “open culture.” Transparency did not equate to “telling it all” but honestly communicating at all levels about issues related to the company. The book acknowledged that business leaders must balance that openness with a certain amount of filtering.
Heather Villa shared how she filters her own open communication:
“I won’t talk about my religious beliefs, my political views, my intimate relationships, or anything else highly controversial or personal. I believe those types of discussions are meant for your immediate family (if not completely personal) and is ‘too much’ transparency.”
Heather is a business owner active in social media. She shares business and personal information but has wisely developed filters for her transparency. In her case, she realizes that too much transparency can be polarizing and may damage current and prospective relationships with customers.
From those in positions of power, we demand a higher standard of excellence. We take joy in the glimpses of transparency but if the blinds are opened too far we lose respect for their position. We like to think of them as “everyman” or “everywoman” but we don’t want them to prove it.
“We have all the tools to publish what happens at every moment in our lives, but we lack the wisdom and experience to edit all that rough draft and make something interesting.”– Jamie Grove
“…airing our dirty laundry to everyone is a little dangerous, and possibly a little over-indulgent.”–Conor
Jamie and Conor aptly point out that exercising a little editing with our transparency is wise. We really don’t have to tell it all. We can tell what is relevant, and even share a little that’s not, but exposing it all can be dangerous and alienating and as Conor noted a little over-indulgent.
Fred Schlegel offered a chilling reality: “Since there really is no way to limit what is public about our lives, we must put in place rules on how the more powerful entities use that info. Sorry to get all George Orwell on ya, but the public info is just the tip of the iceberg.”
Perhaps some believe that they will take charge of the illusion of privacy by ripping down their own veil. I know what’s behind that curtain and I’m determined to hang on to the false illusion of a little mystery for as long as I possibly can.
Does the amount of information shared change your level of respect for a person? Is the boundary the same for everyone or does it depend on other factors?
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Aw, thank you! I really appreciate your kind words, Karen. And, yes, I do try to be open and clear about helping folks improve their health. 😀
.-= Michele´s last blog ..Writers Are Superheroes =-.
Hi Walter! Well, that’s a good point and puts it right back on us. 🙂 It’s not the information but the one who shares it. Well said Walter!
Michele, I am so glad you stopped by too! 🙂 Your openness is not for shock value but is literally saving lives. As Janice noted, context makes a huge difference. While you may share info that might make others uncomfortable your mission is clear and in my book we need more of that kind of transparency.
Fred, bingo! I think you nailed it “Determining what is meaningful from your personal stream will require hard editing decisions.” This is a trait that we don’t often appreciate in leadership. Leaders MUST know how to make those tough decisions and own up when they have edited too much or too little. A leader will not divulge every thought or opinion but the masses will.
Robert, wow, yet another layer to this thicket! So, for you position in your life and influence are key elements in the level of transparency. I had not thought of in that way but agree that on some level we all make that same judgment call.
Robyn, thank you so much for those kind words. You and I agree on so many things and this is yet another common bond. You explore, share, teach and warmly invite discussion. You question to involve us all and we’re all richer for the experience. You are right that many freely discuss and debate the “taboo” topics and while they can be a lightning rod, they can be handled with respect.
Kevin, I love your position of judicious use of transparency. Naomi is another great example, because she is transparent and AUTHENTIC. She is true to her character and makes no apologies for it. Perhaps that is the true key?
Jan, hmmm, this really makes me think. In your last comment you referenced Penelope, Queen of the Envelope pushers. 🙂 I read that tweet and it is a juicy example of something that could completely polarize an audience. Was it gratuitous? Some would say definitely so. Was there a reason for ever sharing that with anyone out loud or was she being true to her own character?
Brad, your comment truly cuts to the heart of this issue, and aligns with what Conor and Barbara shared. Our own style/personality and comfort level drive our transparency and in many cases provides a guidepost of how we react to the transparency of others. However, there are those that push the envelope, make us uncomfortable and we seem to like them. Is there an art to making people squirm but still engaging them?
Conor, what a great point about the reader’s comfort level and really ties in with what Barbara shared. However, in fiction making the reader uncomfortable can actually draw them further into the story. Does that ever hold true for non-fiction?
Barbara, great point about privacy, or better still intimacy and transparency. It also serves to explain why the boundaries are so different for each of us. Does personal comfort determine the line or is there a bigger truth?
The problem lies not in the information. The problem lies within us. We are the ones who give meaning and we are the ones who love to judge–considering the fact that we all wear veils. 🙂
.-= Walter´s last blog ..Why are we having problems with problem? =-.
I think it all depends, Karen. I’ve shared some things others might not share to get certain points across–especially on my health blog, as I’m trying to encourage others that their health can absolutely improve (under most circumstances, and with great effort and lifestyle changes).
This is a beautiful post. I’m so glad I stopped by!
*smiles*
Michele
.-= Michele´s last blog ..Writers Are Superheroes =-.
Your: “but honestly communicating at all levels about issues related to the company” and Erics: “As a writer you know far more about your characters than will ever go into your story” really focus on the core of what to share. I guess a real question involves who does the editing and how does it get done. Determining what is meaningful from your personal stream will require hard editing decisions.
.-= Fred H Schlegel´s last blog ..When Trails Of Science and Art Cross =-.
I think the key to the level of transparency is the role they play – either in public (such as a polititian) or in my own life (such as a friend). We want the level of transparency that is best for that situation.
For instance, in the case of the President of the United States, we need certain information about his or her beliefs, thought patterns, background, etc. in order to feel more comfortable when that person makes decisions that affect our lives.
On the other hand, how much I know about my boss (should I have one again one day) is much more limited to that which keeps me comfortable with our working relationship.
Level of friendship is yet another guide. The more intimate the friendship, the deeper the transparency goes. As I said, it all depends upon the role that person plays in my own life.
.-= Robert Hruzek´s last blog ..Make Every Moment Count =-.
A huge thank you for your insights! I have been reading, learning and being inspired. This post was not about me but truly hearing from and learning from you. There is so much here to feast on and I am so proud to have your wisdom collected here for others to learn from. Tomorrow, after coffee, 🙂 I’ll try to offer a better formed response but just did not want the day to end without saying thank you.
Karen, though we want transparency as people, we never “put it all out there” no matter what. While some discuss religion and politics, others like Heather Villa choose not to. If I do, it is done fairly objectively and I find I would have to do in a thoughtful way. For instance I did a post on Obama as a reader and how he reads numbers of books weekly, but I did not chose to focus on anything political in that post. Guess I am one that does not try to stir controversy.
I want all to feel welcome at my blog. To do that, my goal is to be very inclusive. You are very much that kind of blogger, Karen and a real example!
.-= Robyn McMaster´s last blog ..Blogging Live from World Business Forum =-.
I think there is an analogy to fiction writing.
As a writer you know far more about your characters than will ever go into your story. You have to choose what it is about your character that moves the story forward, is relevant to the story, and what will your readers find interesting.
So using transparency is s kill you have to learn and use judiciously. The amount of transparency is going to vary by person. And by their audience.
People that love reality shows want to see all of the pettiness and drama. They make me want to vomit. So their transparency works for their audience.
I think the same is true for businesses, at least entrepreneurial businesses.
While Naomi Dunford is charming and incredibly intelligent, she is also feisty and foul mouthed. And I can’t imagine her any other way.
Reading Heather Villa’s comment from yesterday amused me because as I start my own blogging I fully intend to write about my politics and beliefs. That’s because they are a part of who I want my audience to be.
I think as long as people find an audience for their level of transparency we will continue to see people behave in ways that make some of us cringe.
.-= Kevin E Blake´s last blog ..Coping with failure: What’s in your toolbox? =-.
Do I respect someone less or more according to their level of shared information? That depends largely on context. And probably intent.
There’s a valid use of juxtaposing something from one context onto another so it stands out, screams for attention. And we see that a lot. Everyone knows the trick, so the intent needs good legs, good content to carry it off, otherwise it’s just a trick. And we all know it. What’s the message if it doesn’t? “I am a trickster. ” So transparency for transparency’s sake, um…not so much.
If the content and the intent is rich, well that’s altogether different. It becomes a way of getting a message out there that may have been overlooked, set aside, not explored. What’s the message? “You can trust me.” And maybe this is the access point.
If transparency, let’s say candor, or revelation, is used….the intent and the content have huge potential …if they have real solid attachment to something of worth… or great amusement… or usefulness, they can be treasures, add value. Engender like minds to congregate. Maybe even impact each other for the better.
Gratuitous revelation? Yes, it’s just carnival time and Momus is in the house… and maybe has had a bit too much “revelry”…and falls off the float right into your lap…now that is not altogether, NOT fun, but maybe not what we had in mind…and maybe not what we need everyday…
Context, I think context is important.
🙂
Karen, When you put something out there about yourself, you have to assume anyone and everyone will read it. There are some things I don’t want everybody to know, so I don’t talk about them. For the most part, the things I want to share privately are the same things I’m not particularly interested in hearing about from social media participants at large. I engage in social media primarily for business purposes – to make business connections and exchange ideas. Over time I find myself developing personal relationships with some people in my network, which is not so different from how things work in the real world. I would share much more with those people, of course, but privately, through email or Twitter DM or on the phone, etc. When I see people putting out all kinds of deeply personal content on social media, I often think they don’t have a real clear idea of what they are trying to accomplish.
.-= Brad Shorr´s last blog ..How To Get More Blog Subscribers =-.
Hi Karen,
This is a great discussion 🙂
I think sharing your experiences and opening up a bit, being vulnerable, has it’s merits. I believe it’s our weakness that binds us, not our strengths. Knowing somebody else feels like you do or goes through similar stresses and situations is empowering.
However, once this goes past an experience shared and becomes an invitation into very intimate details, it can be very uncomfortable for the reader.
I don’t know that it alters my perception of a person or my respect for them, but it definitely unnerves me to a degree. I think blinds are a good analogy. Opening them a little to allow the light in is healthy, ripping them down and exposing everything, warts and all, well that’s not for me 🙂
Conor
There are some things to be shared with people you know…and some things that are nobody else’s business.
Transparency to a point (ie, you walk the walk you talk) is good; beyond that, it can become very damaging indeed.
.-= Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach ´s last blog ..3 Critical Items for Building Your Business in the Recession =-.