Written by Karen D. Swim
Have you ever noticed how every season has its own rhythm, its own unique flow? Summer with longer days and warmer weather has an upbeat but casual rhythm. Rays streaming through the window in the morning are energizing, encouraging you to get up and get moving. However those same rays during the work day can be distracting as they beckon you to come out and play.
This week Ellen Wilson wrote about “the flow.” For many achieving flow in summer is a challenge because of the various distractions. For others, the combination of fun and work is exactly what is needed to achieve flow.
In summer we tend to lighten up. From clothing to food to reading choices, we shed layers and allow ourselves to have a little fun. Many of us find ourselves playing hooky in summer to take a stroll, go for a run in the park, play a few holes of golf, or go to the beach. We give in to that little voice that says “Let’s play!” We take vacations with the family, visit amusement parks, and have impromptu backyard cook-outs. It is a season when we achieve what eludes us during most of the year – balance.
Summer is the perfect time of year to regain a more balanced life and schedule. We can let go of the language that holds us captive in other seasons – “I must,” “I should,”and “I have to” change to “I can,” “I get to,” and “I choose to.” It is a shift that would serve us well all year.
Imagine being faced with a looming deadline and an invitation to attend a Springsteen (insert your performer of choice here) concert where you will have front row seats and backstage passes. In your non-summer language you might say “I can’t, I have to meet this deadline.” Ah, but it’s summer, so instead your internal voice says, “How can I find a way to meet this deadline and go to the concert?” By changing your language, your brain now fixes on solutions and you are empowered with the freedom to choose.
We all respond better when we are in the position of making a choice rather than having one forced upon us. The good news is that you can rock the power of sunshine year round by adopting a mindset of choice and balance. Your Monday Morning blues can become Monday Morning Choose. You hop out of bed (or rise slowly if that’s your thing) equipped with the power of choice. You can either “get to” go to work or “have to.” The choice is yours.
What about you? Are you able to maintain a healthy balance year round? Does summer mean more playtime for you? Feel free to play and chat in the comments. 🙂
Wow Charlane, I am not sure I could do it. Even living in MI I had to adjust to the long daylight hours in summer. Well, I saw your recommendation of Goodreads so I’ll be looking for lots of good reviews from you. 🙂
The constant day light this summer was much harder to adjust to than the darkness in the winter. It was extremely hard to sleep even after making it dark inside my home. My mind kept wanting to keep thinking and my body wanted to keep busy. I am hoping that next summer will be easier. Right now we are starting to get more darkness each day now. 🙂
LOL! Jaden, I clean to relax. I love cleaning – toilets, trash cans, under the fridge. Let’s go with enlightened, much better than OCD!
Evelyn, sometimes just the knowledge it’s a choice really helps, that and a little caffieine. 😉
Friar and Ellen, Hair came out in 1968, and the movie was 1979. I was 4 when the musical came out but in ’79 I somehow learned some of the songs. I can remember, standing in the middle of the floor belting out some of the lyrics and my mother’s mouth dropping open. LOL! And it was not because of my great singing!
Karen, how bold and brave of you; yes you can fly the plane.
Melissa, Yeah, holidays are major slacker time for me. I don’t even try to work.
Ellen, This may sound perverse, but I love cleaning the toilet. I do it daily cuz now our water is weird in my town-du-jour and rusts the toilet bowl when it sits there. I love cleaning anything and seeing it sparkle, it makes me happy. Does that mean I am enlightened or just OCD?
@Ellen and Karen
That’s what annoys me about some of these self-help gurus.
They tell you that “choosing” to clean the toilets is supposed to make it all better.
La-La-La, you get to sing and dance with the toilet faeries and dance around toadstool rings and make plum pudding together. Isn’t it GRAND?
And if you don’t feel this way, it’s indirectly implied that you’re some kind of screw-up, and it’s YOUR fault.
Don’t get me wrong. I liked the Covey course. I agree with most of it.
But I CHOOSE to ignore certain things he says. 😉
@Ellen
Hair? C’mon…you’re not THAT old! You’re the same age as me.
(Though I remember hearing the record from the library, about 10 years after it came out..)
Friars last blog post..Wedding Tips from a Cynical Bachelor
I used to wake up feeling grumpy and all. But I now realise that I can choose to start my mornings differently. Knowing that “I can choose” is an important shift for me!
Evelyn Lims last blog post..Confess Your Secrets
Charlane, living in Iceland has unique challenges. We could all learn so much from you and how you cope. I love the idea of tailoring hobbies to season and the availability of light. That seems like a very smart strategy. Does the lack of daylight ever bother you or do you simply adjust?
Melissa the first year I was in business, I kept working through the holidays. It was quiet because everyone else was celebrating and I was toiling. I finally got a clue the day before New Year’s Day that I could actually could have taken some time off while everyone else was doing the same! So yeah the balance thing has definitely been a learning curve for me!
Rebecca, enjoy your husband and the dog and don’t you dare feel guilty! 🙂
Ellen, ROFL! I know, I know any moment I will be uploading a video of me singing the lyrics to Grease. I saw the movie 27 times and can sing every song in character! LOL! See, that’s what happens when you listen to those gurus, they make it seem all gooey and happy but really even though cleaning the toilet sucks you’re choosing to do it because not doing it would yield unpleasant results. Ha, gotcha! 🙂
I seem to always be striving for a healthy balance because I find distractions every day no matter what season. I have so many hobbies and interest that my focus for this year has been on easing my relentless participation to see what happens.
Right now I am living in Reykjavik, Iceland so I am finding it is nice to have hobbies that go with daylight and hobbies that go better with darkness. We have almost an entire summer of day light and a few months of almost total darkness in the winter. This past winter I finally started writing and even started 2 blogs. So I do think that seasons have a rhythm driving my hobbies here in Iceland. It’s nice.
I loved this post. You are a talented writer.
Cheers,
Charlane
http://charlanebrady.blogspot.com/
Karen,
Okay, first the go go boots and now let the sunshine in. I will have to go and play Hair now.
I’ve had to do mundane stuff like scrubbing the toilet today amongst other things. Like Friar mentions, it sucks, and I don’t care what kind of spin Stephen Covey puts on it! Maybe if I was enlightened it wouldn’t matter what I did. Well, sometimes I don’t mind household stuff. Tonight I’m making fried chicken. I would like some fried chicken, as would everyone else.
Yes, summer is harder to be the ever productive one. Forget-about-it!
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Hi, Karen –
Striking a balance is tough for me in the summer because I’m off my regular routine. You see, my husband is a teacher and he’s home during the summer. It’s really tough to close the door to my home office and write when I’d much rather join him and our dog for a day of hiking in the woods – or a lazy afternoon at the shore …
You know, I notice this same phenomenon occurs around the holidays. Suddenly, you just start making time for things because, after all, “tis the season.” Work-life balance is a big challenge for me, something I’m always working toward but I definitely have a binge-purge type of personality. All or nothing baby!
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Ooh, ooh *raises hand in excitement* since it is imaginary, can I pilot? LOL! Jaden, you are so talented that one day you may have two private planes. I love reading your posts and the Sunday prompts always inspire (too chicken to join in but I like reading!). There are people like Lea Woodward who are location independent. I suppose another benefit to that lifestyle is that you move on before routine settles in thus keeping the flow year long. Hmmm..I could live with lots of travel! 🙂
Yes, I spent last summer in paradise and after many months it eventually became routine, so I went back home before I completely lost the joy and magick. Boy, do I miss it now!!! So beautiful.
I don’t think we can get a group rate when all of us will be coming from different spots on the planet, I think we have to come from one city for a discount.
Anyway, with friends like me, you don’t have to worry about that, I will just hire a private jet to pick up each of us. You leave it up to me. Haha. Yeah. I wish. *wink* Brett, here we come in our imaginary plane.
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Jaden, I am so glad that you shared. It reminded me that no matter where we live we can all fall prey to an unbalanced life. I guess that is why we all need holidays, the change of scenery helps us relax. I do realize that certain cultures move at a different pace, but then sometimes when I talk to those people they don’t see it that way! I guess even paradise could become routine. lol! I have heard that some prefer New Zealand to Australia. I want to visit both. I wonder if we could get a group rate! We can give Brett a housewarming when he moves. 🙂
So true, so true.
Interesting thoughts on language and seasons, Karen.
In Southern California, in Hollywood in particular, people tend to go out every single night, year round. Out in these parts, the “I have to” are designated to drinks, dinner, shows, and traveling because they are usually tied to work, networking for work, and obligations to support friends with their art showings, music gigs, film screenings. Getting dressed up and putting on your happy face every night of the year can be tough.
We are sort of flipped upside down out here. For us, being able to stay home one night and chilling out at a day job can be a big relief! People often sigh a big aaaah when they get to work on Monday and can just sit at their desk and veg out. Doing some gardening, cleaning the house, being able to have a family, those are special rewards when you live in Hollywood.
That’s why I tend to go away from Hollywood and isolate myself in some beautiful place for months at a time; it’s the only way to get any writing work done. I too would really like to go to Australia and New Zealand some day, especially after having met all these cool people online.
Friar, I think I would really like Australia! In the US and Canada we could use a more laid back lifestyle. We would be healthier and happier. On your second comment, ROFL!!! You are funny even when grumpy! I think the key is realizing that you don’t “have to” do anything. You choose to go to your sucky job because you want to have money to pay your bills and live the lifestyle you want. You could choose to be homeless, or a beach bum (this could be fun!) but you choose. However, a little grumpydom helps maintain the balance, eh. 🙂
Wendi, I lived in Southern CA my whole life and the workaholic ethic is not escaped there. The traffic only heightens stress levels. While the weather lends itself nicely to being outdoors more of the year, I can tell you most people still don’t take advantage of it.
Darren, spoken like a true evangelist with a rocking About Me page. 🙂 If you haven’t yet visited Daz’s site, click the link to read his post and prepared to be awed. 🙂
Brad, I love the European approach! Heck, I am not at all surprised that Americans take fewer vacations than the rest of the world and we’re more stressed. We need to chill!
If you moved, eventually it would just become normal and you would revert back to your same habits. 🙂 You would just be doing them with a nice tan. 🙂
Ulla, you paint such a beautiful picture of Berlin, I can’t wait to visit. I love the Fall too. Fall however puts me in a different mindset, more reflective. In summer, I am more playful. 🙂
Brad,
You certainly mean the Southern European approach – life in Berlin can be frantic, too!
I must say that I love every season: the outdoor life of summer – to sit in the park with a notepad or an interesting book, to have interesting talks outside a café; autumn with its leaves changing into beautiful colours, the smell of fresh apples, the cold mornings and the sun warming up your skin in the afternoon; wintertime with sunny and frosty days, hot beverages and the feeling of warmth and coziness when you come in from the cold; and spring with its fresh yellow-green colours and tulips and roses.
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If I lived in Phoenix or southern Cal instead of Chicago, I’d never get any work done. I’ve always liked the European approach — stores open mid morning, late and longish lunch break, more work, late, light meal … doesn’t seem as frantic as here in the States.
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exactly, you can program your mind to be positive and things just seem to go better when you start out with a positive attitude. I’m a believer!
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On a related note, I took the “Seven Habits” course, where they taught us to say “I choose…”, instead of “I have to…”.
For example:
“I choose to go to work today” instead of “I have to go to work today”.
“I choose to scrub my toilet” instead of “I have to scrub the toilet”.
Apparently, this is supposed to change our whole outlook, and make us feel more empowered, that we’re taking control over our lives.
But you know what? This dosent’ help me. Not ONE BIT.
Replacing the word “have to” with “choose” still dosen’t change the fact that the job still needs to be done, and that it will probably SUCK.
I much prefer to say “I have to go to *#$%ing work today”.
I get it out of my system. I feel better and then I just DO IT.
But that’s just me!…a grumpy Friar. 🙂
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I think the Midwest has the “Must play in the summer” mindset. But… I also know that a lot of people waste it too and then they are sorry. I just mentioned to John last night that It’s going to be Aug soon and we haven’t gone golfing yet. But then her rattled off a list of everything we HAVE done. Sigh..we can’t fit it all in….the summer is too short around here.
I belong in California.
You make an interesting point. A few years ago, I spent a few months in Australia. It was interesting to note that their whole culture, their whole work ethic seemed more laid back and relaxed. Maybe that’s becauseit’s summer there most of the time.
(Wish we could learn to be more like them…).
Summer is DEFINITE play time for me. Our winters here are so long and bleak, I almost feel pressured into making the most out of each sunny day.
If I’m inside watching TV or farting around on the computer, I almost feel anxiety..that I have to PLAY OUTSIDE.
Make Hay while the sun shines, so to speak.
(In another month, it will start cooling off and some of the early leaves will already have started changing…)
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