I am sad today. Or perhaps more accurately I am in a mood, though sadness is part of what I feel there is also restlessness, discouragement and a bevy of emotions bubbling beneath the surface each fighting to reach the top. But at this moment it is sadness that seems the most tangible. I submitted my blog to AdAge and was rejected for not having enough points. Funny, it’s how I was feeling when I awakened, not enough points to win the prize, to take my business to the next level to have a good hair day. Some points but not quite enough to finally be “in.” Yet, the rejection was also motivating. I printed it out as a goalpost, something real to work toward. Points I could do, just keep filling the bucket one point at a time until I had enough. So for a moment I was happy to have a problem I could solve.
None of this of course has anything to do with business. Unless you count my brutal honesty that life has those peaks and valleys but there’s always a rainbow, yada yada. I know not very motivational but I warned you I’m in a mood.
I’m sad that I have career marketing clients who have lost their income and are having to make hard financial decisions. I am heartbroken that the Gulf Coast has yet another natural disaster the repercussions of which will ripple for years to come. I’m frustrated that I am not moving fast enough toward the things I want in my business. I’m mad that my hair will never do what I want and my book editing is not yet done.
I wish I could paint like Janice Cartier, for today I would cover a canvas in big broad strokes of red mixed with goldenrod, there would be swirls of green grasping at the pockets of tranquil blue. I would paint until everything within was reflected on that canvas and I would be left spent, clean and ready to replenish my soul. But I cannot paint and today cannot even seem to write. I am left with an uneasiness that comes from having much to say and yet nothing at all that seems worth saying. So I write it down anyway hoping that the act of writing is like an ax that cuts through the thick brush blocking my passage. Yesterday there were gators as I waded through the swampland of my mind, they are gone and though I’ve reached higher ground I am struggling to make my way through the mound of driftwood and broken branches scratching at me as I seek the path once again.
And in the midst of my funk and inner tumult there is business. I must push the muck aside and find the words for others. Inspiration is fleeting and I reach out to grab hold with arms and legs like the Ninja warriors riding the log to the next obstacle in the course.
Thoughts come and taunt me daring me to catch them. I am not fast enough today and must rely on something other than creativity. There is no time to allow myself to simply be until the balance has been restored so within this quagmire I must simply do what must be done. They are counting on me, and I will not let them down.
The business lesson or inspiration in all this “stuff”? Hmmm.Your feelings will not always align with your objectives so you must anchor yourself in the field of commitment and channel the energy beneath the feelings to press on and get the job done. Good that. Pressing on and hitting publish.
How about you any gators snapping at your heels? How do you get it done on the days you just don’t feel like it?