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How far would you go to be famous? If offered a shortcut that would catapult you into stardom, would you take it? Would you change the way you act to fit in to the accepted vision of fame? Would you prioritize your friends and family based on their influence? Would you step on a few toes along the way for the greater goal? How far are you willing to go? Would you distance yourself from your old life to achieve fame and fortune? When the spotlight shines on you will you stand in it alone or share it with those who contributed to the journey?
What would you do for fame?
I am willing to bet that a number of you rejected the self serving, ego-driven behaviors implied by the above questions. You may have even shaken your head as you declared, “No way, not me.” If it’s so distasteful why are you doing it now?
Signs that you may be selling out for fame:
- You only connect with influencers because your time is too valuable
- You turn down a guest post on a small blog in favor of one with more visibility
- You quickly wave everyday but would not recognize the security guard at the front desk of your building
- There is not enough time in the day so you respond to @ replies from important people but ignore the rest
- A client heaps praise on you but you don’t mention the contributions of your team reasoning that any praise includes them too.
- You have not been to a single soccer game or school play in months
- At work you are funny and engaging but so distant from your family they think you moved out of state
- Wanting to appear sophisticated you accept the glass of expensive wine offered to you, even though you do not drink. You will hold it all night occasionally taking a sip, no one will know.
While the above signs are extreme there are other subtle ways which we make tradeoffs. We may reason that it Is the price we have to pay but over time it can erode your soul.
In business and life we all have our own unique version of fame. For some fame is a title, for others it is recognition, and still others it may be the outward signs of financial success. It is our version of fame that motives and drives us as we move toward our goals. Those daydreams of “stardom” fuel our forward motion and inspire us to grow, learn and create. Nothing wrong with dreaming of stardom but there are checkpoints along the way, decisions that allow us to choose who we are now and who we will become in order to achieve our dream.
You can choose to relentlessly pursue fame at any cost, shoving others aside as you grab the spotlight or you can pursue a version of fame that doesn’t sacrifice your values or the people around you. What will you choose? What will you do for fame?
Brad, your parents taught you well and you are a daily representation of the values they clearly instilled in you.
Excellent post and discussion! One thing I’m learning as I go along in life is that you should give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Appearances can be very deceiving and there are many ways to measure success. Here’s a small but telling example that relates to social media. As I counsel companies on how to promote their Twitter and Facebook pages, I urge them to get all the employees involved – not just the executives or the marketing department. For all you know, there is a quiet, unassuming clerk in Accounts Payable who has 500 Facebook friends and thousands of Twitter connections, someone who’s authority is so great that he or she could influence hundreds of people to visit the company’s pages. I know this can happen because I’ve seen it happen. Big people I know – people who are successful in all sorts of ways – tend to treat all people as big people. My parents are like that and I hope it’s rubbed off on me.
Andrew, I am definitely not perfect but one of the things I learned from my parents is that everyone is important, or more accurately we have value simply because we are human. Thanks for sharing your story. I think there is always that part of us that doesn’t want to feel weird. It’s like the remnants of our teenage years that never seem to completely go away.
Karen,
This is always an important topic, but it is especially timely now given the release of the new Wall Street movie. I can’t wait to see it.
I can certainly relate to the last point. Just last Sunday, I was out at a hotel restaurant. I ordered wine even though most of the others ordered beer and I don’t particularly like the taste of wine (I prefer scotch and coke). I guess in some way I was probably trying to fit some stereotype associated with sophistication.
More broadly, though, anyone who does not show respect to ‘unimportant’ people has serious egotistical problems. I have a simple philosophy – give everyone the proper courtesy and respect they deserve. That includes, but is not limited to, those who may have an important role to play in the individual success.
(And we ought to remember one thing: we never know when we might just need the help of one of these ‘unimportant’ people in an emergency or crisis)
Lillie, so very true! Much easier to spot the beam in our brother’s eye especially when it is highlighted on a bigger stage than to see the speck in our own eye. I know that I am a continual work in progress.
Hey there Robert! You are so right that it sneaks up on you. If we are examining our heart and actions each day and making a choice every day we will find ourselves on the other side of our values.
Karen,
It’s so easy to recognize when others do this—movie stars and athletes and corporate executives come to mind immediately. It’s harder to see when we get our own priorities wrong. We can so easily justify ourselves.
The problem with all those things is they have a way of sneakin’ up on you without you realizing it. It takes a decision and a commitment – and vigilance – to keep from falling into the trap.
Ol’ Shakespeare said it well: “To thine own self be true!”