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Facebook, the Illusion of Privacy and Loud Mouth Quitters

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Sigh. I was not planning on writing a post on Facebook although I have been sharing extensively on the issue. Still, I was not going to step out on my own and say a word until Brad Shorr and Joanna Paterson double teamed me. Okay, they did not intentionally double team me. Unbeknownst to one another both published posts yesterday on Facebook. Both, in their typical style, examined the issue and offered honest, balanced opinions. That however is not what prompted me to write, no it was a comment by Brad on Joanna’s post that reminded me of my social responsibility to educate others on a key issue that is in fact in my area of expertise. Sigh.

So, is Facebook evil? I cannot pretend to know the hearts and minds of the Facebook team but in a word “no.” Like Joanna and Brad, I have a love-hate relationship with Facebook. To be fair, I also love-hate email, twitter and coupons. Welcome to my world. Yes, Facebook has convoluted, unbelievably complicated privacy controls, and I take my stand with others seeking a change, but evil is pushing it in my opinion.

Privacy online is a myth. I learned this years ago when we had nothing more than email and bulletin boards. I sent a “private” email to a recently fired colleague. My “private” email ended up as “evidence” in my friend’s lawsuit against the company. A simple gesture of kindness, and solidarity sent “privately” was in fact discoverable. The lesson stuck and 9/11 pushed it deeper.

If you want private, don’t share it. I am not excusing Facebook’s privacy policy but we should be clear that our words and actions are rarely private. Do you use reward cards, credit cards or buy any products or services? Do you have a driver’s license, social security card or insurance? Do you live in a place that has public cameras (street lights, security cameras)? Information is collected about us all the time and used in various ways to monitor and/or predict our behavior.

Yet, the platforms we use also have a responsibility in making it easy for us to manage the flow of information. This is the “hate” part of my relationship with Facebook.

There are those that will diligently plow through the information, read the policy carefully and take precautions. Others will ignore or tune out the hubbub and continue to play Farmville, chat with friends and post funny pictures. Still others will protest loudly and lead an army of people to quit altogether.

The people who will ignore the warnings are largely the “real people” that brought many of us to Facebook in the first place. You know the people who don’t live in the social media echo chamber, are not opted in to a million lists and simply take the web and its content at face value. Yea, the people we marketers salaciously went after once we discovered they were on Facebook.

I find it hypocritical that “we” descended upon Facebook in droves and happily took advantage of the freedom to grow our networks and market our careers, products and services yet we now spit venom at the “evil ones” for daring to actually collect and use that information.

Again, this is no defense of Facebook’s policy but perhaps we should take the plank out of our own eyes before we remove the speck in our brother’s eye. We created this with our sharing and connecting. Did we really believe that a free tool would not see an opportunity to monetize our actions?

I am all for protesting to make things better and safer for everyone. I am joining the one day Facebook black out and I will continue to loudly add my voice to others urging for change but I will not cry foul and leave entirely. We have a responsibility to protect ourselves and I believe our communities. So, I will continue to love-hate Facebook but I will not blame them for a monster we collectively created.

How about you? What precautions do you take online? What are your feelings about online privacy?

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Conversation and Social Media

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This is indeed the age of conversation – conversations that move across platforms and geographies. Some occur in small snippets at a time while others are in depth discussions that linger for a period of time.  Whether the conversations are digital or offline, the conventions have not changed. There are rules of engagement, social and cultural mores, appropriate language and dress and always the keen reminder that conversations are a dialogue not a monologue.

All too often the focus is on the tools as people ask how to grow a Facebook page or amass followers on Twitter, but it’s still about people. Whether your conversations are social, casual or professional n reality the foundation has not shifted.  No one fails at Twitter because they were unable to figure out how to tweet. Social media efforts go off the rails because of a failure to communicate.

Pretty pictures, splashy campaigns and automated systems are wonderful tools but don’t forget the real reason you’re there is to engage others in the conversation.

What tips do you have for engaging others in conversation? Does your online approach differ from your offline approach?

Age of Conversation 3 is coming soon.

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Personal Uses for Social Media

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In my work with clients I spend a great deal of time assessing, developing and executing social media strategies for business. Yet, there is a very real personal benefit to social media and each platform offers something different.

In recent weeks, I had been largely absent from the social media scene. There were no new posts, or tweets, no links shared on Facebook or FriendFeed. It can be difficult coming back after an absence as Joanna Young recently detailed but social media was a huge help.

After my absence, I felt a little shaky, much like regaining your land legs after a period at sea. Facebook proved to be a nice launch point to regain my balance. The smaller, more intimate nature of Facebook proved less demanding. I could give a thumbs up and never say a word. I could have discussions about ice cream or ants and others happily jumped in with comments.

I viewed photos and read status updates which helped me to regain that sense of connection. I had felt so alone for so long, but somehow less so as I enjoyed what was going on in the lives of my Facebook friends.

My business only accounts on various networks including Twitter gave me an opportunity to stay plugged in and share without having to explain my absence in other places. This helped me remain productive and relevant even in my silence.

Skype allowed me to have one on one conversations for business and personal. It was much easier to focus what energy I had on one person at a time, and each conversation left me feeling upbeat and useful.

Connecting with others is essential to our physical and emotional health. Sometimes it is not possible to connect in person and social media can fill or supplement that vital need.

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Let’s Connect – Maybe

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The velvet box inside the box that was inside ...
Image by simonech via Flickr

Written by Karen D. Swim

The invitation arrived in a velvet box tied with silk ribbon. Inside the box atop dupont silk was the quirky greeting inviting me to join the party.

Excited to meet new friends, I dressed in my best party clothes and showed up on time. I tapped on the door holding my invitation in one hand. No one answered so I gently pushed the door and it swung open. “Hello” I called out softly. I stepped in and as my eyes adjusted to the light I saw that I was in a narrow waiting room of sorts. There was a gated door and a small table to the right.

I walked toward the table and picked up a plain white sheet of paper that read, “Please fill out this form to be invited to the party.” I dropped the paper on the table. Was this a joke? I was invited to apply for entrance to the party.

Inviting someone to connect with you on a social media platform and then blocking entrance is no different from this party scenario. Choosing to have your Twitter or FriendFeed stream protected from the public is a legitimate choice. Social media platforms are an excellent way to connect with work teams, friends and family. You can share real time updates, photos, links and files on an easy to use platform that allows group and one-on-one discussion without the hassle of email.

Iron Gates
Image by BGLincoln via Flickr

A private stream for private purposes is a smart use of technology. However, many are inviting strangers to participate in their private stream. Well, sort of. The internet is wonderful but privacy concerns are real and everyone should exercise caution in the amount of information that is revealed. However, if you are going to network, it is difficult to open the door and then slam it shut when someone attempts to reciprocate.

I have worked with many clients who have had to overcome their concerns about privacy and transparency in order to participate in social media. Some joined and lurked a bit before fully participating; others jumped right in and over time grew comfortable with the “personal” conversations. Still others network as they do in real life, all business with nothing more personal than an occasional comment about traffic or a lukewarm latte.

I am not a fan of issuing rules around social networking. It is not one size fits all. You will use the tools to fit your purpose and personality. However, if you are considering the “kind-of, sort-of” model I have described here then be prepared for others to refuse to play.  If you really want to connect and you’re a little shy, just stand next to me, I’ll hold your hand and introduce you to my friends.

How do you balance networking with privacy? Any tips to share with new networkers?

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It’s All About You

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♡♡♡ Thank you my Friend ♡♡♡
Image by janusz l via Flickr

Written by Karen D. Swim

“I’m not addicted to FaceBook. Or Twitter. Or LinkedIn. I’m addicted to you. Your energy.” @manicactive, via Twitter
The above tweet was sent out yesterday by the infectiously enthusiastic Laura Bergells. (Side note: Whether sharing information, links or just chatting, Laura has a way of communicating with warmth and humanity. If you are on twitter, she is one to follow. ) When I read the tweet it reaffirmed my own belief that the “why” of most of our actions is in direct relation to our humanity and the sharing of such with others.

Without people the tools we use and the actions we take are rather hollow. With all that is going on in our collective worlds and the demands on our time, Laura’s tweet reminded me to celebrate the people in my life.

If you’re reading this post today, thank you. Whether you realize it or not,  each one of you has added value and beauty to my life. Yes, even those who read in silence, I know you’re there and am so very thankful that you continue to subscribe to this little blog.

Now back to you! Wonderful things are happening and here’s a few that you should not miss:

  • The wonderful Kelly Erickson is celebrating her 300th post. Please join in by leaving a comment and telling a friend or five. Your comment will enter you in a drawing for some cool prizes but in my opinion Kelly’s posts are more than enough reasont to visit and read.
  • Amy  Palko has launched a new blog with a focus on social media. Amy’s keen mind and artistic lens adds a fresh perspective to this space.
  • Chris Garrett is offering a webinar packed with valuable information and the price is a donation to a children’s charity.  Chris is such a gracious man and this is one of the many ways he walks the talk.
  • Joyful Jubilant Learning is having a month long love affair with books. There have been a wide variety of excellent book reviews by a superstar lineup of contributors. I’m scheduled to participate over the weekend and hope you’ll pop over and share.
  • What better way to celebrate community than to share what they have taught you? Joanna Young is hosting a group writing project that invites you to share the writing lessons you have learned from your blogging community. You have until March 27th to enter.
What are you celebrating this week?  Was there any one person who encouraged or motivated you this week?
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The Walking Wounded and Socially Fatigued

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Written by Karen D. Swim

The other day I received an email notification that one of my Twitter followers was no longer following me. I clicked through to the follower’s twitter page and the most recent tweet (message) indicated that he was changing his twitter account un-following everyone and only following those who could have a direct impact on his business.

I was not offended by the un-follow but questioned the strategy. Is it possible to know who will impact our business? Human relationships are not linear so it is impossible to predict the trajectory of an interaction with someone you consider “unessential.” One of the benefits of having a broad social network, online or offline is the access to people beyond our immediate circle of influence. A social network like Twitter affords you the opportunity to be visible to a broad, diverse group and all those who follow them. That is both the benefit and the problem.

The interactions suddenly swell to a high level of noise and you look for ways to tone down the volume. Some are like me and simply take the occasional break from online interactions. Others may un-follow or quit networks altogether. Many have chosen to limit the interaction by shutting off their Facebook Wall or Blog Comments. Those who have a true need/desire can simply send a message or email.

With the rise of social networks we ripped the lid from Pandora’s box and unleashed a beast whose tentacles reach far and wide. As we choke on the glut of social interaction, we begin to question our previous adoration of those shiny new tools. Is it too late to tame this social beast?

The reality is we really do need people. We require some level of interaction in our personal and professional lives. Unfortunately, we cannot control how people choose to interact with us, or respond to us when we try to establish boundaries.

My advice is to look carefully before you leap into any social network. The honeymoon period will come to an end and you will be left with a relationship to manage. Is it worth your long term commitment?

Are you among the socially fatigued? How are you managing the balance?

References:

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