inpsiration | Words For Hire

No Time For Fishing

June 22, 2009 by Karen Swim

“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” —Lao Tzu

This ancient proverb is often trotted out as proof that the best help we can provide to our fellow man is to equip him or her for self-help. The problem is we’d much rather utter the hollow platitude than to actually spend time living it. We want to hold others accountable for their actions but leave little room for compassion. We blame the poor for their poverty (unless they live in a foreign country), the jobless for their unemployment and the uneducated for their failure to take advantage of their opportunity.

Our answer to real human suffering is to tell everyone to suck it up and “attract” a better life. Teaching a man to fish implies a willingness to get your hands dirty and interact with another human being, really interact. You may have to foot the bill for the pole and bait and give up time to walk them through step by step. It may take more than one lesson and it may require you to adjust your teaching style to fit their needs. You may even have to give him a meal first so that he has strength to learn.

It makes me wonder if we say it but truly mean, “Dude, fix your own problems.” Equipping a man to live for a lifetime is noble and compassionate. Empty platitudes on the other hand, in my book, are not only lame but downright mean in the face of true suffering.

What do you think? Are we content uttering nice sounding phrases or are we really willing to take time to help someone in need?

Paralyzing Perfectionism

November 3, 2008 by Karen Swim

Image via Wikipedia

Written by Karen D. Swim

“Getting through a first draft will require you leave perfectionism and self-criticism at the door. Fear not: We’ll keep them both safe and return them to you in December.” –Chris Baty, NaNoWriMo

As I read this line from my first NaNo email on Saturday, I realized that I would be all too happy to leave perfectionism and self-criticism behind. They are two attributes with deep roots in my life, nurtured by the childhood rewards of A pluses and gold stars, and strengthened by a lifetime of rewards for good behavior.

We humans are fond of perfectionism. We strive to be flawless. We reward 100% and beyond. We applaud it in school and in the workplace. Perfect is the ultimate compliment.

I worked in Healthcare for more than two decades. Imperfection could cost a life. For nearly ten of those years I worked for a clinical laboratory. A false positive, or false negative, lost sample or lost report were critical errors that affected the hospital, physician, and patient. Errors could affect a life and my bottom line. I became a Six Sigma trainer and learned the true difference between 99% and 100%.

Today, however, as I think of it I realize that even error free may not be perfect. An error free lab test is not perfect. Much of medicine is in fact, imperfect. As a writer, I can strive for grammatical and factual accuracy but alas, I will still not be a perfect writer.

I will never be perfect. The realization does not depress me but frees me. I will still strive to get there anyway because the true beauty is in the process, the journey itself. With my newfound knowledge, I will take the journey with a healthy balance of self-criticism and self-nurture. No longer will I allow the goal and it’s taskmaster to rule over me. No, I’m not perfect but the daily goal of trying to see how close I can get just got a lot more fun.

Chris, I really appreciate you safeguarding my treasures of perfectionism and self-criticism but I won’t be needing those back, thank you very much. I’ve replaced them with something far better – freedom. So far, it feels pretty good. If I change my mind, I’ll let you know.

How about you? Have you shaken off the shackles of paralyzing self-perfection? What tips do you have for balancing working toward quality without allowing it to stifle you?

Overview of Six Sigma

Shadow Box Your Way to Success

October 1, 2008 by Karen Swim

Image by hmmlargeart via Flickr

Written by Karen D. Swim

Jab, jab, block, jab, jab, hook. The young boy danced and punched away at his shadow. Seeing his imaginary opponent, anticipating moves, block, punch, punch, hook. His father stood quietly in the background, watching him fighting his shadow, preparing for the real thing. The boy had gotten stronger, more assured. Each punch seemed to land an imaginary knock-out. Punch, punch, hook, punch, block. Sweat poured from the boy’s brow as he dipped, blocked and punched at his shadow. The boy was focused, his shadow was his sparring partner as he readied for the real battle ahead. Punch, punch, jab, hook.
We should all shadow box. Each of us has an opponent to overcome, a battle to win in every area of life. We cannot always practice in the ring but we can prepare for battle by shadow boxing. We can practice our moves, anticipate return punches, quicken our steps and grow stronger and more confident. The practice, though imaginary readies us for battle, prepares us to win.

Sometimes the shadowy opponent represents our own inner selves. We punch away at fear. We take a jab at doubt. Punch, punch, jab, jab until we stand the victor, dominating the ring. Or as Sonia Simone wrote last month, we punch to practice. We train our minds, bodies, and craft to do battle and win.

Whether your battle is a big sales call, marketing your business, a presentation, job interview or starting a weight loss plan, punch away at your shadowy opponent. Anticipate when they will move left, or right. Imagine the obstacles and punch through them. Feel the weight as you tire and keep punching anyway. Punch, punch, jab, hook. It worked for the boy, it can work for you too.

How do you prepare for the “battles” of your life? Do you practice or wing it? Your comments are welcomed here, so join the fun! 🙂

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